Questions & Answers

Hey Terra,

I have two bffs (Best Friends Forever), a girl and a guy. I love both of them to death but now I find out that my guy friend is crazy about me. I love him to death but I just want him as my friend. I have dated some of my guy friends and I wish I would just not done that cuz after I broke up with them or they broke up with me, our friendship was not the same. So I wrote my guy a note about it and he seemed pretty sad. Somehow he came up with something about me not wanting to hang around with him now that I know that he likes me. I told him that I would just pretend like I didn't know but he's still down about this whole thing. I feel pretty bad about it and I don't know what to say to him now!

Caught

Dear Caught,

When you cross over into the Bf/Gf Zone with a former guy friend it usually spells big trouble. Because teen relationships just don't last and when the break-up comes it usually causes some hard feelings (or at the very least so awkwardness). Then... there goes the friendship! :O(

You can't control the fact that your guy friend feels "pretty sad" about what you told him. He was hurt and he didn't really get what you said... Maybe it's because you weren't entirely honest with him. (Maybe you could send him another note that tells the whole truth. Something like this: "I love having you as my friend. That's not a little thing, that's a huge deal to me. Real friends have to be honest with each other. The honest truth is that I'm flattered you have feelings for me, but I'm sorry but I don't have romantic feelings for you. I can't help that. Your friendship is very precious to me and I hope that my being honest with you hasn't wrecked the good thing that we have together. Let's talk."

How do you think he'd respond to a note like that?

In friendship,

Terra

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